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Friday, July 6, 2012

RFF: How I (Almost) Sold my Brother for 25 Cents

In order to maintain the chronology of my life story, I need to tell you about the time that I (almost) sold my brother for the whooping sum of 25 cents (in 1975 that was like $4,567,980,321,450).

The story actually begins six months before the successful fateful day.

It was the day that we picked my brother up from the adoption agency and brought him home. I was almost four years old.

I think that this event is one of my earliest memories. Interesting the things that we remember.

To this point, I was spoiled rotten the only child. My world as I knew it was over and I was pissed not pleased.

I played it cool but my repeated attempts to smother love him were all foiled.

So I came up with Plan B.

My mother was having a get together with a whole bunch of suckers nice ladies. I donned my apron (can still picture it today), inserted a plethera of dolls in each of the four front pockets and went about selling my wares.

As legend goes, I walked around yelling "Babies for Saaaale, Babies for Saaaale". Finally I had an unsuspecting fool taker and the deal was sealed with a quarter.

Little did she know.

Not one to renege on my promises, I immediately ran upstairs to my brothers room, took him out of his crib and attempted to leave the premises. I was going to load him into her car (or anyones for that matter). Talk about customer service!

Needless to say, my Plan (to rid myself of this parasite) was once again foiled.

On to Plan C.

All was not lost, I got to keep the quarter.

Be sure to check back next week when I tell you the story about...

"How I Pooped my Pants"!

This post was written in response to Insane Mamacita's Weekly Random Fact Friday Hop. Hop on over and see what other people had to share.

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Besos, The Zoo

12 comments:

  1. Awesome stuff! My kids are 2 & 4 at the moment and I could totally see my son trying to pull something like this! They act so loving and kind while you are around but we all know what goes on behind closed doors.

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  2. This is fun! My mom would've kicked me out of the house for even thinking of selling my brother. Although I had thought of doing it at some point. Lol

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  3. Ha ha thats awesome! I love the humour in your posts!

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  4. Oh my goodness! This is so awesome! I love your sense of humour in your posts! Thanks for the morning laughs :)

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  5. Glad you got to keep the quarter ROFL! Great post!

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  6. Great post! I am always amazed by kids imagination.

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  7. That's funny! Have you heard the song, "Brother for sale? Only 25 cents?" I think you would like it!

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    1. I haven't heard it. Off to Youtube it!

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  8. LOVE this, and it is just like Brother for Sale! LOL My boys love that song! I love how you were wily enough to psyche people out with dolls first!

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  9. That's awesome!!! Cracked me up. I was seven when my little brother was born and did some pretty rotten things too. Though I will admit I never tried to sell him... Should have thought of that!!!

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